Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Overflowing

My head and my heart are overflowing right now with so many things that I want to express, yet mere words seem inadequate.

Phrases that circle through my mind all day are...
I am blessed.
God is so gracious.
SO worth the wait.

I am blessed. 
I have been so overwhelmed by the love and support that we have received. I had no idea how many people have been praying for this sweet boy. We have the most amazing friends  and family. What a blessing it has been for me to realize just how many people really love Ben. We have been loved on and ministered to in ways that I couldn't even dream.

God is so gracious. 
Adoption was not my plan. As someone very wise once told me, "It was not my plan A or to be completely honest, not even my plan B." BUT GOD is gracious enough to change my heart. My plan C was always his plan A. Always. I just couldn't see that. He is gracious enough to be patient and wait for me. Gracious enough not to give me what I thought I wanted because He was holding out for something so much better. When I hold my sweet Ben, I cannot imagine being a mom any other way.

SO worth the wait. 
This little boy is the perfect child that God intended for us all along. He is not a consolation prize and certainly not second best. I love him more than I could ever dream and know without a doubt that he is the greatest thing that I could have ever hoped for. If it meant walking our long and painful journey 1000 more times, I would do it in a heartbeat to get to Ben. He is worth every painful decision, every heartbreak, every tear...SO worth the wait.

7 comments:

  1. beautiful.
    much love to you all.

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  2. Jenni, you're making me cry! This is so beautiful and we cannot express how happy we are for you guys!!

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  3. Jenni, I love your heart and your vulnerability to share your sweet story. Every time I anxiously read a new post, I'm left with tears of joy and so much excitement for you guys. Our Lord is sooo good!!! Thank you Jesus for this sweet baby boy!

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  4. Weeping tears of joy. Love your heart for God. Why does it always take us so long to understand what He wants for us is perfect when we think we know better??? Can't wait to hold Ben. Maybe soon. Love you, Mammy

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  5. What a testimony you and Rusty will have through this wonderful miracle baby that God has sent your way. God is so faithful and patient with us all.

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  6. You are such an encouragement to me. When I start doubting or worry tries to over take me you post something that ministers to my heart. I'm so happy you have found your sweet Ben. What a lucky little man he is to have such a faithful mommy.

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  7. My heart explodes with joy every time I think of you!

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