Baby food

My new project as a stay at home mom: making my own organic baby food. 

It really is easy and economical! I never thought I would care so much about knowing exactly what is in food, until Ben came along! 

There are several different machines out there, but I use the baby brezza. I have been very happy with it!

So far I have made pears, sweet potatoes, bananas and apples for Ben. (And some strawberry smoothies for myself!)

He is my little helper in the kitchen:

Ben is a big fan!

Memories...

A few months ago, I went to get some old pictures off of my external drive. I am pretty sure that my heart stopped for a few beats when I realized that my drive was dead. DEAD.

Wedding photos... gone.
Honeymoon photos...gone.
Pictures of Holland...gone.
All of my photos...gone. And folks, y'all know how much I love my photos.

I tried not to panic and instead went into total denial. I thought that if I ignored it, I would come back to it in a few weeks and it would magically fix itself. So, I came back. But it was still dead.

I have this amazingly smart friend that works for IBM and I am pretty sure was building his own computers when he was four. I begged him to help me. He said he would give it a shot, but couldn't promise anything.

Well, PRAISE. THE. LORD!!!  He worked his techie magic and restored ALL of my photos to a new hard drive! How amazing is that?

As I thumb through all of the photos, I am just overwhelmed with thanks! These are a few of the MANY photos that I would have lost!

One of our first dates 

The picture that created my nickname... Tia

Our rehearsal dinner

Front row tickets to Aerosmith

Saying "goodbye" to Holland

Our engagement photo

In Costa Rica on our honeymoon

My nephew Jacksson's birth

My favorite photo of Nate

Poppa's retirement party

Halloween 2005

New Life fundraiser where I was the speaker

Rusty and George

Sweet friends at an Aid Sudan Event

Our first Christmas

Rusty's sweet Nana

To blog or not to blog? That is the question.

I've sat down to update this blog about 15 times for every one post that actually makes it. 

I type. 

I stop. 

I quit. 

You see, I am torn. 

Right now, my life is Ben. 24/7, 100% Ben. And I love every single minute of it. (Ok, let's be honest- some of those minutes are pretty exhausting. You know, make me want to cry, call Rusty at work with very frequent phrase "When are you coming home?", go to the gym just because you want an hour of childcare, minutes. But deep down, I still love it.)

That's where I am. That's the season that I am in right now.  But, I feel bad blogging about Ben as if I have forgotten the pain that came with the waiting or not acknowledging those that read this blog who are still overwhelmed by that pain.

This started as my "infertility" blog and I don't want it to turn into my "bragging about Ben" blog. 

I've had that debate in my head for the last few months and yet somehow as I put the thought into words, I am realizing how I actually feel about it. This is not a "bragging about Ben" blog. It is what it was always intended to be... "Bragging about what God has done!" blog. 

Being given this amazing gift is not the end of my journey or ours as a family. It is just a step. God has been faithful. I love to look back over this journey and see all that He has done and how He has provided. But, I know that He isn't done yet. He has more in store for us! I just know it. 

So, this blog will continue to proclaim God's faithfulness to us. 

But during this season of my life, that will probably include lots of pictures of this sweet boy:

5 months old

Boy clothes!

On March 4th, we got the phone call from Cindy that changed our lives forever... 

We had been chosen by a birthmom due in March with a baby boy!

Within less than one month prior to that call, we had lost two babies- Sarah and another girl that I never blogged about. So, for obvious reasons, we were hesitant to get excited. 

And yet, I just couldn't help but be. 

Rusty and I were on our way out of town that afternoon for a long weekend with friends in Scottsdale, Arizona. We weren't sure then, but know now that it was to be our "babymoon", our last childless vacation!

While we were there, my mind was reeling with all that we needed to do to change from girl mode to boy.  Though we had tried to stick to gender neutral, I had pretty much failed and had a closet full of pink, a drawer full of bows and lots of flowered accessories. So, I was ready to start the switch ASAP. 

Rusty was more hesitant, but he loves me :) and knows me well enough to know that I wasn't going to rest until I had something "boy" in my hands, so we went to the mall in Scottsdale. I bought the most precious little vest and slacks that I had ever seen!

 

My heart felt full as we walked out of the store with boy clothes in hand. Somehow it just made it feel more real. This is the picture that I took of the outfit as we rode in the cab back to our hotel. I was full of hope and prayer that one day soon, we would have a little boy wearing that suit.

And (though the pants are still too big) Ben was finally able to wear the vest to church a few weeks ago. It brought tears to my eyes to see my symbol of hope fulfilled! 

And he looked pretty stinkin' handsome in it too, if you ask me!